The incidence of domestic violence in New York State has increased over the past four years, and the figures are astounding.
According to the Office for the Prevention of Domestic Violence, “domestic violence was 20,909, a 17% increase from 2009 and a 41% increase from 2007.”
The Center Against Domestic Violence, located in Brooklyn, New York, is one of the many facilities that provide shelters for victims of domestic disputes. Its website indicates that the center “opened the first publicly funded domestic violence shelter in New York State in 1977.”
It is apparent that domestic disputes within New York State may continue to rise over the next few years. Although, the only way to defeat your enemy is to become familiar with it. Consequently, people can acquire the skills to either dismantle or circumvent this tragic occurrence altogether.
The typical adult relationship is destined for occasional heartaches, disagreements, insecurities, and mistrust. Some contend that there may be no other way to determine a healthy relationship from one that is detrimental unless these trials are experienced firsthand.
If one were to analyze disagreements in the context of a relationship, they would soon discover a myriad of complications.
The Wellness Center at Santa Clara University claims that disagreements can “become abusive, which is unhealthy or even dangerous to the overall relationship or an involved partner.”
They also stressed that relationship abuse “destroys committed relationships such as marriage and long-term partnerships as well as the new relationship.”
Their website compiled a list with 9 forms of abuse that will hinder a couple from progressing in a healthy fashion:
1) Using Isolation
Example – limiting your outside involvement
2) Using Emotional Abuse
Example – making someone feel bad about themselves
3) Using Children
Example – making others feel bad about their parenting styles
4) Using Intimidation, Coercion and Threats
Example – consistently threatening to leave the relationship
5) Minimizing, Denying and Blaming
Example – saying the abuse did not take place
6) Physical Abuse
Example – confining, slapping, pushing, or causing any form of visible harm
7) Using Social Status and Privilege
Example – reinforcing control by using gender, race, class, etc
8) Using Economic Abuse
Example – taking your lover’s money
9) Sexual Abuse
Example – includes any form of sexual activity that is not desired
Abusive relationships are an ever growing concern. The best way for individuals to protect themselves, male or female, is to become aware of its presence regardless of how subtle it may be. When it comes to courtship and marriage, the small problems have a tendency to become major contributing factors to an abusive relationship. Sadly enough, once a certain line is crossed, very little can be done to salvage what may be left behind.