As he mulled (Why is “mull” even a word? It sounds terrible and continues to annoy me by reminding me of Martin Mull.) another bid for the White House, former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee brought a message of strong family values to Iowa this weekend as he headlined a major gathering of social conservatives. (The opening act, Blue Oyster Cult was off not fearing the reaper.)
Huckabee, who ran for the 2008 Republican presidential nomination and won that year’s Iowa caucuses (And not much else), pointed to what he considered the current assault on marriage and families as a factor in the rise of poverty.
Said the former Governor, “Statistics show poverty is largely the result of the traditional family’s decline. (Or is the traditional family’s decline the result of poverty?) When children grow up in homes where the mother and father don’t work, don’t have an education and are solely on government assistance – then everyone involved becomes trapped in a devastating cycle of poverty.
When asked what his solution was for helping families out of work with little education outside of Government assistance, Huckabee was rather non-responsive. “Well….I, uh…..you see….what you can do….is…..whoa? is that a Whopper?”
(Editor’s note: that last part may or may not have happened.)
“The traditional family’s decline directly affects poverty levels and this nation’s economic recovery. Conservatives know that our government can spend billions on social programs and can throw all the money it wants to at poverty – but we can never truly address poverty until we first heal broken families,” adds Huckabee.
When asked what Conservatives would rather throw money at, the Governor quickly quipped, “Big ole tax cuts for the mega-rich! Yeah baby!! Then they’ll somehow create a few jobs for the poor, out of work families…..provided they move to Asia and work for pennies on the dollar that is!”
The Iowa Family Policy Center, where Huckabee will speak Sunday and a nonprofit research and educational organization that says its mission is to “restore and defend traditional moral principles in the culture by advocating for sound public policy.”
As to the laws or policies Huckabee would promote and support for this completely unsubstantiated issue, he, uh….well…..let’s be honest…he didn’t say anything. How does a law maker actually promote “Family Values” anyhow?
As to Huckabee’s chances for repeating his 2008 Presidential run, the public was fairly unaware there was much going on in the world anyway. They were too busy watching “Dancing with the Stars” or “America’s Top Steamadore”.
According to a new Pew poll, only 46 percent of those surveyed correctly identified that the Republican Party won the House as a result of the November 2 elections, yet thought Dr. House could cure all their medical problems in a flash. But it’s not all bad – 75 percent did know the Republicans performed better than the Democrats, it’s just that many aren’t aware exactly what the party won.
However, most American’s were aware that 4 out of 5 dentists recommended Trident for their patients who chew gum, which was amazing seeing how that Ad was nearly 3 decades old.
14 percent thought the GOP won control of both the chambers, 8 percent thought Republicans won just the Senate, and 27 percent didn’t know one way or the other. Five percent meanwhile thought Democrats maintained control of both the House and Senate. And 16 percent thought Nancy Pelosi was a lesbian Nazi and John Boehner was a robot. (He is rather stiff you know.)
The questions about the election were part of a larger poll quizzing American’s knowledge on current events. Among the poll’s other findings:
- 38 percent correctly identified John Boehner as the incoming House Speaker
- 16 percent correctly said more than half of the loans made under the Troubled Asset Relief Program had been repaid
- A whopping 52 percent correctly thought Abid and Troy were the funniest characters on “Community” (Last week’s blanket fort side story was hysterical!)
- 15 percent correctly identified David Cameron as Prime Minister of England; the same amount said it was ex-BP CEO Tony Hayward and 3 percent said “that Crocodile Dundee guy”
- 26 percent know Android is the operating system by Google for mobile phones
- And the doctors said that Nordberg had a 50-50 chance of surviving…..but that there was only a 10 percent chance of that. (Thank you Captain Ed Hocken.)
And how did the former Arkansas Governor poll among Republicans? A recent survey from CNN/Opinion Research Corporation, indicated that Huckabee remained at or near the top of the pack among possible contenders in any hypothetical race for the GOP presidential nomination.
Unfortunately, all of them still polled lower than Ronald Reagan with conservatives and Tea Party members, and he’s freakin’ dead!